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May 21st, 1999

Why Shakespeare Can't Win in the Movies

by

Charles Boyes

The latest venture into "Bardland", the independantly produced A Midsummer Night's Dream, falled flat on its face earning a disgraceful 4.3 million in its opening weekend, compared to the opening weekend of Black Mask, 4.4 million. But why do Shakespearean films and other small independant films not do as well as big budget Hollywood blockbusters? There is actually a simple reason and it all has to do with the direction society is headed, and last time I checked it was on its last revolution before flowing down the crapper. People today don't want realistic stories to remind them how pathetic and depressing their lives are, instead for two hours they want to be lifted from their meaningless lives and watch Will Smith blow up giant bugs. People don't want to think, they want to be "blown away" with bright lights and deafening noises. This is fun to the to the unintelligent and uncultured. Sure, at some time or another, we all laugh at a Jim Carey joke or are amazed by some computer graphic, but those of us will an IQ above that of an eggplant, can look back and realize how stupid it really was. We can also pick out the good films from the bad. Saving Private Ryan, good; The Waterboy, bad. Shakespeare in Love, good; Varsity Blues, bad. See how simple it is. So why can the general masses not understand this. Why, in ten years they'll be running the world. And hell, with influences like Jean Claude Van Damme and Will Smith who could go wrong. Our Presidents will play video games all day and our Prime Ministers will make crank calls to Pizza Pizza at 4am. You may think it sounds stupid, but look around you. Look at your friends or your brothers or sisters friends. Look in any high school or elementary school and you'll see just how scary it really is. We can tell what kind of person you are, but what films you watch and more importently enjoy. Indulgence is one thing, enjoyment is another.